The Good News

I didn't want to get too deep into relationship matters today, but I'll admit I've been thinking about it a lot over the past few years. Most of my friends, including myself, have just crossed over the 30 mark. Most of my friends, also including me, are single. I don't think I feel as hard pressed as some of them might feel to to meet someone, get married and start a family. Although that would be nice, the reality is finding a mate (or as I like to see it, being found by my mate) is probably one of the scariest, most important things that will ever happen in my life. I don't want to make a hasty decision. My mom always says this and it's really simple but, "haste makes waste". Marriage is til death do you part, although I know it's possible to experience the "D" word I don't like to pronounce, that's not something I want to experience.

So, that kind of brings me to the point of this post. I read a book years ago called Choosing God's Best by Dr. Ron Raunikar. There was one part in the book that really intrigued me and it was "God Reveals, Man Initiates and Woman Chooses." I always thought that this concept was interesting because my father used to tell my mom the same thing. There's more to this concept that I'm not touching on so it's definitely worth a read.

I realize that over the past few years I've been in such hot pursuit to build my career that I've never really taken the time to nurture relationships and that includes friendships. So, I got to thinking about this whole reveals, initiates, choose cycle. I remember when I first moved to Brooklyn, I went apartment hunting. I went to see a few apts that I had had picked out and a few that were suggested by my broker. I put in an application for one that I'd chosen and it took forever to get a response back. In the meantime, a good friend of mine introduced me to a lady who lived across the hall. The lady had a an apartment that she was renting. So, I agreed to go check out the space and was quite pleasantly surprised with what I saw on the inside. I was also ecstatic about the rent. But, I still had my heart set on the other place. I was willing to risk loosing the place my friend recommended to pursue the other, higher priced, flashier apartment.

After several weeks, I finally heard back about the apartment I really wanted. To my disappointment I was rejected. I was crushed. After getting the news, I kind of had a little melt down. I felt helpless. At that moment I was reminded that I'd already seen an apartment that pretty much fit most of my criteria. It was by no means perfect but it was what I needed (little did I know at the time that there would be added benefits too). So, weeks had past since I'd seen the place and I worried that it had been rented. So, my prayer to God was that if this place was still available, I'd take it. I felt silly that I didn't just take it when I had the chance to take it but no. I just had to see what else was out there even though I knew this was the best place for me. So I called the lady renting the apt and she said that her cousin had already promised it to someone else. BUT since she had shown it to me first and she liked me she would cancel the deal with the other lady so that I could have the unit. I was happy but not overly as the deal could still fall through. But it didn't and today, I still live in that apartment. As I mentioned it is far from perfect, but I still love it. It's home. And the added perk is that I have off street parking for my car (Hallelujah!)

I said all of that to illustrate how, the reveals, initiates, chooses process can work. Yeah, I used an apartment for the illustration, but replace the apartment with people or someone's name. Of course every situation is different but it shows how human nature can be. My Father knows best and even though I had a lot to choose from He allowed me to weigh my options and helped me make the best choice for me. God is the ultimate matchmaker and I know that if he can help me with the daunting task of finding an apartment in New York City, He is more than able to introduce me and help me decipher the man whose rib cage He fashioned me from.